


Only Forward

by blackbones



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Anger, Goodbyes, M/M, Sad Goodbyes, and the thing they were fighting over is nonexistent, anyways it’s sad cuz I have sad feelings about these boys, goodbye kiss, it doesn’t go anywhere cuz I’m not that kind of writer, not canon compliant bc dealer doesn’t die, teen rating for some vague suggestiveness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:48:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25253362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackbones/pseuds/blackbones
Summary: Hot Rod and Dealer say goodbye.
Relationships: Hot Rod/Doubledealer
Comments: 6
Kudos: 11





	Only Forward

Hot Rod followed the directions left for him by Dealer, wandering way out into the wilds of the alien planet his ship was currently stopped on. He clambered onto a small plateau and hadn’t even begun to look it over before he was grabbed and flung over someone’s shoulder, landing flat on his back.

“You’re so trusting,” Dealer said, appearing in Hot Rod’s vision.

“And you think I’m stupid for it,” Hot Rod snapped. He liked Dealer, had trusted him, still wanted to trust him, but he was also angry his friend had betrayed him.

“Not stupid, just naive. Nobody gets anywhere in this world by trusting people.” Dealer planted his foot on Hot Rod’s chest to push him back down, then sat straddling Hot Rod’s hips.

“Right, like how our team trusted you and died because you sold them out.”

Dealer shrugged. “I didn’t care about them much anyway. Not like how I care about you.” He leaned down to press his forehead against Hot Rod’s chest, running his hands over the warm chassis underneath him, feeling the pulse of Hot Rod’s spark under his plating.

“You killed our team,” Hot Rod repeated, voice tight.

“To protect you,” Dealer said.

“I don’t need you to protect me.”

“I want to protect you.”

Hot Rod shivered as Dealer’s fingers traced the edges of his armor. “I don’t want to trade anyone’s life for my own,” he said. “No matter how much you want to.”

Dealer pulled back, sitting up to glare down at Hot Rod. “Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you. You said you didn’t want to fight in this Primus-forsaken war so I’m trying to get you out. Don’t throw it back in my face!”

“Fighting for my life is better than letting people I care about die needlessly!”

“It wasn’t needlessly, why don’t you see that?! I promised I’d take you away from this war, stop fighting me about it!”

“All the money you’ve saved up is from selling out Autobots to Decepticons,” Hot Rod snapped, propping himself on his elbows. “Why did you think I would be okay with that?”

Dealer shook his head, anger dissipating. “You weren’t supposed to find out.” He looked down at Hot Rod. Sweet, beautiful, naive Hot Rod. “Forget where I got the money. Just run away with me. We’ll go where the Autobots and Decepticons will never find us. You’ll never have to kill again.”

Hot Rod sat up to face Dealer properly. “I can’t run away now, not with blood money. Stay with me, just a little longer. We’ll get some honest money and leave right.”

Dealer took Hot Rod’s hands in his own, holding them tight. “I can’t stay,” he said. “There are people expecting things from me you won’t approve of. If I stay, they’ll hunt me down. I have to go, with or without you.”

Hot Rod squeezed Dealer’s hands in return. “You’re safer with the Autobots. We can protect you-”

“The others won’t protect me knowing what I’ve done.”

“They will, they won’t let the Decepticons have you.” Hot Rod’s protests died as Dealer shook his head again. Dealer stood, releasing Hot Rod’s hands and the heat of his frame.

“This is where we say goodbye.”

Hot Rod shook his head. “No, you don’t have to go,” he said, voice breaking.

Dealer smiled sadly and pulled Hot Rod to his feet.

“Please,” Hot Rod begged softly, reaching for Dealer.

Dealer leaned into Hot Rod’s touch, letting warm hands cup his face. He leaned in further and kissed Hot Rod. Slow and sorrowful, Hot Rod breaking against him. No, not breaking - just bending. Hot Rod would never break. He was so much stronger than anything the universe could throw at him.

They pressed their foreheads together, dreading the letting go.

Finally, Dealer stepped back, Hot Rod’s warm hands slipping from his frame. He looked into Hot Rod’s bright optics and managed a smile.

“Come find me someday, okay?”

Hot Rod nodded, throat too full of words he couldn’t say.

Dealer’s smile softened. “Goodbye, Hot Rod.” He turned and walked away for the last time, not looking back.

In the silence left behind, Hot Rod crumpled and cried, his spark breaking until it felt like it would never recover.

He didn’t move until someone pinged him, wondering where he was. Hurting but knowing he had to get up, he forced himself to his feet and started back to the ship.

He would find Dealer again, someday in the distant future, when the war was just a bad memory and they could live in peace. He had to find Dealer again and forgive him for everything he’d done. Everything they’d both done. Laying on the ground feeling sorry for himself wouldn’t solve a thing, only moving forward would.

Only forward.

**Author's Note:**

> Can’t find any Hot Rod/Dealer content so I gotta make it myself


End file.
